If you're considering music lessons for your child, or even for yourself, you've probably spent time weighing the excitement against the logistics. We often see a moment of real hesitation when families look at the calendar and then back at the instrument. The question isn't whether music is worthwhile, everyone agrees it is, but whether it can realistically fit into an already busy schedule. You are not alone worrying about this. It's perfectly normal to wonder: Will this new commitment add too much stress? Will it be another thing to police? What happens if our schedule changes? We understand that for music lessons to be truly beneficial, they must work alongside your real life. We want to clear up some of the most common parental concerns, so you can see that starting music doesn't have to mean sacrificing your peace of mind.
One of the biggest concerns we hear is, "What if they don't stick with it?" Parents tend to frame music lessons as a marathon. That is, they feel that if a child stops playing at any point, the entire effort would be wasted. This perspective adds immense, unnecessary pressure to the beginning stages. At Elkhart School of Music, we ask for a minimum commitment of 8 weeks to start lessons. That’s it. 8 weeks. No one becomes a musician overnight and certainly a student can’t be expected to show advanced skills after only 8 weeks. However, this small commitment allows the student to explore his instrument of choice by “tasting” what it’s going to take to achieve his goals. Without a long-term commitment, a parent (or adult student as the case may be) can rest easier knowing that there can be a swift end to his commitment if the student changes his mind or just isn’t ready yet for formalized lessons. If the student continues after his initial 8-weeks, the commitment becomes just one month at a time. The goal of early music lessons isn't aimed at lifelong commitment; it's about building a foundational skill set, learning discipline without distress, and discovering if music is a source of joy. If a student receives lessons for a while and then pauses or chooses another activity, they still walk away with improved focus, coordination, patience, better problem solving skills, and a lasting appreciation for music. That is a success, not a failure. We focus on making the start gentle and the experience meaningful, regardless of how long the journey lasts.
Another area of friction between parents and students is practice. “How long each day should I have him practice?” is a quest for guidance that many parents want. Here we need a mindset change. At Elkhart School of Music, we do not want parents and/or students to focus on the amount of time that’s devoted to practice. If you do that, then the only focus the student will have will be on the clock and NOT on the skill he is trying to learn. Instead, focus on the material being practiced and not on the time spent practicing. One way to do this is to make practice time a part of school homework. Establish the habit of adding music practice to the student’s daily homework assignments from school. If adding music practice to the homework routine doesn’t resonate with you, then choose another time that does. Right after dinner or before a favorite TV program are suggestions but make it something that works for you and your child. By establishing a set time to practice, music then becomes a part of the daily learning routine that gives structure and predictability to your child.
If a day is missed for any reason, don’t browbeat the student or yourself about the missed day. Consistence IS important, but life happens and there will be times when getting practice is just not possible. Never assign guilt or blame for the missed day. Just move on and pick up the next day. If several days are missed due to illness or vacation, that’s ok. The important thing to focus on at those times is to heal or to have a wonderful time on vacation. You may find that the longer than usual break has helped your student to be refreshed and more eager to learn when he returns to his studies.
Q: How much time does Elkhart School of Music (ESOM) expect us to dedicate each week?
A: We encourage families to establish a daily routine for when to practice music. It is not about the length of time spent but rather about the quality of the time spent. Focusing on the assignment is more important than the amount of time spent on it.
Q: Do I need to be a musician to help my child practice?
A: Absolutely not. Your primary role is simply to provide encouragement, support, and a consistent time/space.
Q: How Do I Show Encouragement and Support?
A: You show encouragement by being interested in the music that your child is working on. Ask them to show you their music and maybe get them to explain what they are trying to learn. This will help you understand better what the child is trying to accomplish. Asking them to perform the assignment for you supports them by letting them know that you care about their development. This also helps you to gauge how your child is feeling about his music. Listen to his frustrations if he says that something is too hard or if he gets whiney. Young students don’t know how to verbalize their feelings and often show these emotions by acting out. Just listening and then helping them to put those emotions into words will often dispel the negativity associated with those feelings. Bring any questions or concerns to the teacher. Be positive even if the piece sounds rough.
Q: How Do I Know if My Child is Staying on Track?
A: At ESOM, parents are allowed to sit in the studio during the student’s lesson time. That is encouraged especially when the child is very young but can be done at any time regardless of the child’s age. If they know that you know what they should be working on, they will be less likely to goof off when practicing at home. Ask them to play their assignment for you after a couple days of practice. This shows you are interested and gives them an appreciative audience where they can feel safe. That’s a good, gentle way to get them used to playing for someone else which will help them in future recitals or when relatives come over and want to hear them play something.
Q: What if we miss a lesson?
A: We understand that life happens. We ask you to let us know by text or call that you cannot come to your lesson. We allow one month from the date of the missed lesson to recover it. Our policies and procedures sheet is given to every family and gives specific and detailed instructions in this regard.
Q: What if our lesson time no longer fits our schedule?
A: No problem! We will do our very best to find a new day and/or time that works better for you.
